The elephant in the room no one wants to talk about – Child Sexual Abuse

Often at the sessions of “The Bachpan project”, I wonder why it’s difficult for the child to speak about child sexual abuse. Why do they go though years of abuse to finally accept it? Why do they even need a counsellor when they have parents around?

Believe it or not, In most societies child sexual abuse is still a taboo, making it difficult for most people to talk about it openly. Then there are demons like doubting our own perceptions, being afraid to accuse someone falsely, and being unable or unwilling to go through the pain that can stem from acknowledging that someone we care about is being abused or is abusing.

Let’s first talk about why they are not able to talk about it?

Fear that no one will understand

Sexual abuse is hard to prove because there are rarely witnesses. Many people think that unless they can prove abuse has taken place, they don’t have the right to speak up about behaviors or observations that concern them. It’s important to act responsibly, but saying nothing because you think you don’t have enough proof can expose a child to danger.

Looking for reasons rather than signs

It’s an innocent child for God’s sake who will first need to come to term with the fact that he is being abused, don’t look for reason, for logic, for concern before you act. If you’re concerned about child sexual abuse, ask yourself what exactly you’re seeing that makes you uncomfortable or suspicious. You may be thinking that all you have is a gut feeling that something isn’t quite right. Go by that damn gut feeling. Never ever ignore it. Because your intuition and your feelings are connected to a behavior, interaction or event that actually took place.

You may be a loner voice in suspecting fishy

It can take enormous courage and determination to stand up when no one else shares your concerns. Some people try speaking up, but when others ignore or dismiss what they have to say, they can become too intimidated to bring the subject up again. It always happens but do remember your one act can save a life, your one step of trust is all that a child needs to believe in the power of goodness. If a child has disclosed that they are being abused, adults might not believe the child unless they understand that children rarely lie about sexual abuse.

If you’re not sure, get help to assess if these behaviors indicate a risk of sexual abuse. Figuring out if the behaviors that worry you are significant is hard to do by yourself.

Reach to us at The Bachpan Project if you need professional assistance.

Reach to us at for sessions on child sexual abuse in schools and organizations.

Act because we need to make sure that childhood is not trapped in abuse and violence.

Think Positive………is all that we have to say?

I used to take sessions on mental illness at schools under my Bachpan Project, i have many people, many readers discussing their “issues”, as they call it with me. I don’t call it issues, i don’t like to call it illness too because it is much deeper than that. I call it life, life because falling in and out of love is life, life because being hurt is life, life because not feeling okay without any reason is life, life because thinking you are depressed is life too.

Few days back i was having an incredibly low phase of life as i like to call it, the sleep went away, books were left unread, calls unanswered and thoughts cluttered. My Instagram filters added up and my life became unfiltered. There were temporary phases of feel good with long spells of anxiety.  Our mind is a glorious bastard, do you realize that it manipulates our memory according to our perception. In my part of memory, I went home and talked to my mother saying I don’t know how I will tolerate the job that doesn’t motivate me, how i will close the curtain of an unhappy relationship. In the same memory, my mother and dad say Think positively, and this is it.

When i talk about their perception of that day, the conversation is all about Think Positively. I am on my phone, busy chatting to someone they don’t recognize and they think its just her restless phase. You have always been like that since a teenager, Think Positively” they say and we laugh. We laugh and have some dessert at dinner to shoo it off.

But i remember that phase drains me up, i remember that no one hugs me up and says not to think positively. I remember being told that i was always this angry girl, i am not angry i want to say but i stay shut. The roots of your changed behavior is traced to some idea of weights that needed to be released. At brunches, at dinner is served empathy when each one talks about a girl with a no name who should have “thought positively, the mouth freshener is the sympathetic talk on people’s struggles.

And then they retire, retire in silence to the elephant in room. No one wants to talk about it. Think Positive laughs from a corner. I remember the story i heard in childhood about a king who was made to believe that only people who have brains can see the cloth he is wearing, he goes around naked in his city and everyone admires the cloth. No one wants to accept that the king is naked. No one wants to accept that they don’t have brains. No one in us wants to accept that we are imperfect.

“Think Positive” is the same invisible cloth i guess. In this apartment where i live alone but it’s my own piece of peace, here i do everything to smile. The Amrita Pritam poster, Gulzar and his magical lines and flowers, but i don’t want any “Think Positive” to enter this space. My coping up is beautiful in it’s own way.

As for family, as for the friends who watched from a distance i have no complaints. We have been instilled with the idea of  taking so much pride in our families that the pain is camouflaged.

Have i let go of the hurt ?

For now i don’t have answers to it and Yes i am not thinking positively, i am just taking my time.



Yourself…… the word


No Country for old men

Population ageing is a global issue, which has been recognized to have implications on the health care and social welfare systems. The process whereby the proportion of children in the population decreases and those of old persons increases is known as the “ageing of population”. The global population of elderly has constantly been increasing during the second half of the last century. This has been possible due to easy availability of life saving drugs, control of famines, and various communicable diseases, better awareness and supply of nutrition and health facilities and comparatively better overall standard of living. These achievements have resulted in drastic reduction in mortality rates and substantial increase in the life expectancy at birth and the overall span of people.

Ageing is a continuous, irreversible, universal process, which starts from conception till the death of an individual. However, the age at which one’s productive contribution declines and one tends to be economically dependent can probably be treated as the onset of the aged stage of life.With the rapidly increasing number of aged compounded by disintegration of joint families and ever increasing influence of modernization and new life styles, the care of elderly has emerged as an important issue in India.

The common psychological problems that most of the older persons experience are : feeling of powerlessness, feeling of inferiority, depression, uselessness, isolation and reduced competence. These problems along with social disabilities like widowhood, societal prejudice and segregation aggravate the frustration of elderly people.


We start our Speaking Cinema with a movie that is winning critical acclaim all over for its  tale  of emotional depth and understated paradox, Hotel Salvation (Mukti Bhawan) describes the tragicomic ordeal of an over-worked modern son who is forced to set his job aside and accompany his elderly father to the holy city of Varanasi to, presumably, die.

Driving Miss daisy is about an old Jewish woman and her African-American chauffeur in the American South have a relationship that grows and improves over the years.

The Bucket List features two terminally ill men escape from a cancer ward and head off on a road trip with a wish list of to-dos before they die.

The bolywood movie Baghban was a tell tale of the ignorance and loneliness that ensues after a family betrays its old ones.A love story of an elderly couple resonated with many.

Cheeni Kum was one standalone movie depicting the emotional and sexual desires of an aged man who falls for a girl much younger of his age.

Perhaps the greatest portrayal of one’s final years is Kurosawa’s Ikiru in particular the scene where Takashi Shimura unexpectedly sings in a crowded nightclub, the boys and girls around him silent, reminded of their own fleeting mortality.

As a standout portrayal of the elderly in film, Tatie Danielle stands out. for its delicious subversion of the kindly old lady role. At 82 years old Danielle is not sweet, considerate or cute, she can be smart, cunning and deliciously bad, non- angel types.


Being alone is not the same as being lonely #L #Loneliness #AtoZChallenge

We’re all a bit scared of loneliness – of being alone. Of being left. Of not being loved. Or needed. Or cared about. “Lonely” hits a spot of fear in all of us even if we don’t acknowledge it.

Being alone is a state of being by oneself without others around. It can actually be a healthy phenomenon, as everyone needs a little time away from others to plan, to think, and to rest.

However, being lonely is a different matter entirely. We are especially prone to loneliness in the modern society. Social media like Facebook, Whatsapp, or Snapchat may allow more convenient communication, but all these ways of communication neglect the importance of face-to-face socialization.

And at the end, despite many “friends” we have on the online media, they don’t really have anyone to talk to when they need friends most.

We prefer online communication to face-to-face conversation because online communication is less committed, if you don’t respond instantly, it’s okay. But face-to-face conversation doesn’t really need to be stressful. When you’re with someone who you can be comfortable with, silence is precious too.

Audrey Hepburn once said:

“As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands, one for helping yourself, the other for helping others”

This quote highlights the importance of helping others, and also highlights the fact that most of the time we are the key to many problems we are facing; in other words, you can cure your loneliness.

Giving others a hand will help you realize your value, as you discover you are capable of doing so. And helping others also open up opportunities of deep friendships, as very often, a deep relationship is forged in adversity.

When we talk about “helping others”, you don’t need to always save others by risking life. You can just pay attention to details.

Write your colleague a card if he or she is unhappy. Read out loud for the old man living next to you. Or help a child to reach the top of a rack


Charulata –  Charulata, a beautiful saga of loneliness by Styajit ray himself  is based on a story by Rabindranath Tagore, Nastanirh (The broken Nest) and set in Calcutta in the late nineteenth century. Bengal Renaissance is at its peak and India is under the British rule. The film revolves around Charulata / Charu (Madhabi Mukherjee), the childless, intelligent and beautiful wife of Bhupati (Sailen Mukherjee). He edits and publishes a political newspaper. Bhupati is an upper class Bengali intellectual with a keen interest in politics and the freedom movement.

Charu is interested in the arts, literature and poetry. Though Bhupati loves his wife, he has no time for her. She has little to do in the house run by a fleet of servants. Sensing her boredom, Bhupati invites Charu’s elder brother Umapada and wife Manda to live with them. Umapada helps in running of the magazine and the printing press. Manda with her silly and crude ways is no company for the sensitive and intelligent Charulata.

Amal (Soumitra Chatterjee), Bhupati’s younger cousin comes on a visit. Bhupati asks him to encourage Charu’s cultural interests. Amal is young, handsome and is of the same age group as Charu. He has literary ambitions and shares her interests in poetry. He provides her with much needed intellectual companionship and attention. An intimate relationship develops between Charulata and Amal. There is a hint of rivalry when she publishes a short story on her own without his knowledge. He realizes that Charulata is in love with him but is reluctant to reciprocate due to the guilt involved.

As a respect to Satyajit Ray, we will discuss Charulata only in detail.

In Charulata, Satyajit Ray explores the emergence of the modern woman in the upper-class of colonial India. One can not help drawing parallels with Ibsen’s A Doll’s House.

The opening sequence is a piece of cinematic poetry. We see the young wife Charulata moving from one window to another in her house. She observes the activities of the outside world through the window blinds using opera glasses. She is like a caged bird in her mansion. We sense her curiosity and desire to know the outside world.

As she moves to the interior corridor of the house, we see her intellectual husband. He is too engrossed in a book and walks past her without even noticing her presence. She watches him as he walks away and stands reading. Charu raises her opera glasses and looks again as if he too belongs to the outside world. As Bhupati disappears from the view, she is expressionless and lets the opera glasses slip down. The camera is pulled back sharply, “like a flourish with a pen at the end of an essay …” in Ray’s words. Without a dialogue being spoken, we know Charulata is condemned to her loneliness and boredom.

In the final sequence, as Bhupati returns home after wandering aimlessly, Charu opens the door. Gently and with hesitation, she asks him to enter. A wavering Bhupati enters the door and reaches toward her hand. The shot is frozen and is followed with still images of Charu’s half-lit face, Bhupati’s half-lit face, a servant holding a lamp, a mid-shot of Charu and Bhupati and finally a long-shot of them. As the music rises the words “Nastanirh” (Bengali, The Broken Nest) fill the screen. It was ray’s cinematic answer to Tagore’s original ending in which Bhupati has to go out of town and Charu asks him to take her with him. He hesitates to which Charu says “Thak” meaning “Let it be”. As Ray explained later, it was his visual equivalent of the word “Thak”. “The two are about to reconcile and then prevented from doing so.”

Hail Satyajit Ray.

May be it’s not just a habit #Kleptomania

There are three stages of stealing- Stealing because you need it, stealing just because of a habit and third being recurrent failure to resist urges to steal items that you generally don’t really need and that usually have little value.

Kleptomania is a type of impulse control disorder — a disorder that’s characterized by problems with emotional or behavioral self-control. If you have an impulse control disorder, you have difficulty resisting the temptation or drive to perform an act that’s excessive or harmful to you or someone else.

Many people with kleptomania live lives of secret shame because they’re afraid to seek mental health treatment. Although there’s no cure for kleptomania, treatment with medication or psychotherapy may be able to help end the cycle of compulsive stealing.

Episodes of kleptomania generally occur spontaneously, usually without planning and without help or collaboration from another person.Most people with kleptomania steal from public places, such as stores and supermarkets. Some may steal from friends or acquaintances.

Keep in mind that kleptomania is a mental health condition, not a character flaw, and approach your loved one without blame or accusatio


Mom, Dad and Her: Sydney is a troubled who has been caught shoplifting and a case of alcohol poisoning, Sydney’s desperate single mother sends her off to the country to live with her father, Ben, and his family. A story of father- daughter relationship.





The Film Critic: Victor (Rafael Spregelburd), the  film critic! And he’s been at it for a while, since he conflates cinema with reality, he’s broke, so when a producer asks him to write scenes for a script, he can’t afford to decline. He hates romantic comedies because they’re shallow and predictable, but he falls into one when he competes for an apartment with Sofía (Dolores Fonzi), a beautiful kleptomaniac. He fights his feelings, but she’s a manic pixie dream girl.


Seek help before this impulsive disorder lands you into trouble.

The Incredible Irresistible Introverts #I #AtoZChallenge

Courtesy- Lifehack

Introverts are some of the most underrated and misjudged people today, and how most people perceive them is far from who they really are and what they really do.
Extroverts tend to be better at communicating and expressing their thoughts and feelings, while introverts are known to be reserved and hesitant when it comes to disclosing, and the movies listed can be a basic and useful guide for extroverts to understand and see the world in an introvert’s eyes.
The Perks of Being a Wallflower” shows through a protagonist called Charlie  that introverts always have thoughts inside their heads, they engage in deep conversations, ruminate about life, the universe, and everything, and take the time to really reflect on all that’s going on in the world around them.. It is so moving and will bring back good and bad memories from high school that would make not just introverts, but everyone, feel nostalgic and emotional.

Celebrated French director Jean-Pierre Jeunet directed the 2001 comedy-drama, which received recognition both critically and commercially. “Amélie” is a beautiful movie depicting a story of a lonely woman, who is not great at having conversations, but she is probably the most inspiring introvert character of all.

When they connect, the connect is special. An introvert is letting you know they’re interested in connecting with you beyond a superficial level. They’re displaying a level of intimacy and vulnerability that not many people get to see, like “The Station Agent”  film directed by Tom McCarthy, which revolves around the life of Fin, a man with dwarfism, who lives in solitude in an abandoned train depot.

Following a personal tragedy, Fin retired from his job and chose to live alone, but he finds himself growing closer to his neighbors each day and the bond that is displayed is beautiful.

We all dream of having a partner with whom we can just talk about everything and nothing for hours on end. Someone who listens and really understands what is in your heart.

This is one of the introvert’s superpowers. They love to listen and if you’re having a bad day or are homesick, you know who can make you feel better.

I don’t have friends,Watson”

Yep, You’re right. I’m talking about the famous character ever made, not only in books but also in the screen- Sherlock.

In a crowd, they’re the ones hovering around the outside, watching, observing, usually with a sly smile and a devious look on their face and bet they are charming.

Introverts avoid the spotlight like vampires avoid sunlight. They’re not looking to be the center of attention.While they’ll likely run and hide when their name is called, you can be assured that when you step off the stage, they’ll be the ones cheering the loudest.

Movies and television shows often portray introverts this way.  From the days of The Breakfast Club to Little Miss Sunshine to Napoleon Dynamite to The Perks of Being a Wallflower, introverts are often portrayed as awkwardly shy people, often ok to average looking, and typically unpopular.

Further reinforcing this stereotype are movies like and Can’t Buy Me Love where a bet happens over making geek introverts into popular extroverts.

Fortunately, the moral of most of these latter stories is that the introverts don’t need to be turned into exceptional, incredibly attractive people by the extroverted popular crowd. They already are.

Be you all introverts, believe me you make best of friends, amazing partners and super caring siblings.


How to speak about your mental condition #H #AtoZChallenge

OK. We have made a lot of hoopla around mental health and the forms of illness and we will continue that.

But the question that i was asked by a reader was how to speak about it. And gosh, that is important and we completely missed it.

If you recognize symptoms of any common mental health problem and are worried, or if you feel that something isn’t right but you can’t put your finger on why, we recommend that you speak to someone in family, someone who cares and then therapist.

Some of the most frequently experienced symptoms include:

  • loss of apetite
  • feeling low or constantly anxious or worrying
  • thinking negative thoughts about yourself
  • irritability or moodiness
  • finding it harder than usual to concentrate
  • not enjoying your life as much as you once did
  • finding day-to-day life difficult (not feeling up to washing or eating, for example)
  • trouble sleeping, or sleeping too much
  • seeing or hearing things that other people do not see or hear

One thing is important- You may be generally sad and not depressed even with these symptoms, it’s the persistence of these symptoms over a period of time that is crucial.

It can be daunting to speak to someone that you may not know well about your mental health, but most people find that speaking  can make all the difference to their lives.

And this “Speaking Up” is not a cake walk and we know that. Make some pointers before you speak to your therapist:

  • Be patient, the treatment mat take time.
  • Communication is the key- Your doctor is not a mind reader or an astrologer, communicate clearly about your life events or thought process so that he/ she can come up with proper diagnosis.
  • State your expectations and understand his limitations
  • Be a good person with timely follow back.
  • Remember that diagnosing and treating depression takes time and expertise, so if your goal is to make your symptoms disappear immediately, you’re likely to be disappointed
  • Treat him/her as a friend rather than a doctor.

Speaking Cinema

One movie that hugely impressed me with a patient- therapist relationship is Dear Zindagi. This  exploration of the inner life of a young successful, ambitious woman confused with relationships (Sounds familiar……Na?) is fairly unprecedented in Bollywood. In Tanu Weds Manu 2, we do get a chance to see Tanu’s  bipolar struggles. But the shabby treatment of the movie and a predictable attempt to make it comedy with punchlines like

“Tu Kaun hai be?”

“Main kandha hun”( I am that shoulder on which girls lean). ………….Oh please, give me some better jokes.

Instead, in the opening scene, Tanu manages to turn marriage counselling into an opportunity to get her husband locked up in an asylum.(WTF) In Queen, Rani needs the trip to Paris to transform herself into this confident avatar (But we ain’t geeting Paris dear ladies)

It’s soothing, therefore, to hear Khan tell Kiara that she doesn’t have to forgive her parents or confront them for abandoning her. To hear Khan tell Kiara that she is not “cheap” but “superfine” to not settle for the first man who comes down the pike. Kiara has  nightmares about society judging her for being unmarried and unloved. (Happening with definitely me).It’s even more soothing when Khan tells Kiara that no society — no matter how judgmental — doesn’t have to think well of her, as long as she thinks well of herself.

The best part about this movie is how Gauri shinde doesn’t create any love angle between therapist and Kaira. And that is how it should be, we all are left crushing over Shahrukh and a rocking chair. But what we leave behind is :

When Kaira confesses about life being an interminable musical in so far as the new singer guy in her life is concerned, SRK’s Dr Khan is quick to retort with a good humoured jibe: “Aur tumhein to dialogue pasand hain (You like dialogues)”. Or when he himself says “we are all our own teachers in the school of life” and then comes back with “ye kuchh zyada heavy ho gaya (it’s too heavy-handed)”. Oh, we love you Shahrukh.

Dear Zindagi is a breezy change in the rare movies pertaining to mental health. I will leave you with a beautiful deleted scene of Dear Zindagi.


When Gender is the demon……… #GenderDysphoria

First i want to make some points crystal clear before you read:

Gender dysphoria is not the same as gender nonconformity, which refers to behaviors not matching the gender norms or stereotypes of the gender assigned at birth. Examples  include occasional cross-dressing in adult men. Gender nonconformity is not a mental disorder. Gender dysphoria is also not the same being gay/lesbian.

Gender dysphoria used to be called “gender identity disorder.” But the crisis of identity associated with gender is not the mental illness,Instead, what need to be addressed are the stress, depression that come along with this dysphoria.

How to identify Gender Dysphoria

In children, these symptoms may include:

  • Consistently saying they are really a girl even though they have the physical traits of a boy or really a boy if they have the physical traits of a girl
  • Strongly preferring friends of the sex with which they identify
  • Rejecting the clothes, toys, and games typical for boys or girls
  • Refusing to urinate in the way — standing or sitting — that other boys or girls typically do
  • Saying they want to get rid of their genitals
  • Believing that even though they have the physical traits of a girl they will grow up to be a man; or believing if they have the physical traits of a boy they will still be a woman when they grow up
  • Having extreme distress about the body changes that happen during puberty

Why it’s important: Studies suggest that 71% of people with gender dysphoria end up being chronically depressed or schizophrenic and have abnormal sexual life leading to marked proportion of 23% ending in suicides.


Boys don’t Cry: Based on a true story, Boys Don’t Cry was adapted from the life of Brandon Teena, born Teena Brandon, a woman who chose to live her life as a man and suffered tragic consequences as a result. A true story about hope, fear, and the courage it takes to be yourself, Boys Don’t Cry is critically acclaimed love story. Brandon falls in love with a beautiful girl named Lana, and there’s an undercurrent question that’s never quite answered as we wonder if Lana knows that Brandon is still physically female.Starring Hilary Swank and Chloe Sevigny, this is an excellent, brutal and unforgettable film.

Hedwig and the angry inch : Ok i am smitten by this movie.I’ve  watched this one over and over . It’s a love story, a glam-rock musical, a comedy, a search for meaning, a journey of discovery and a story about loneliness and redemption.

This story begins with Hansel, the child of a German mother and American-soldier father, being raised behind the Berlin wall. As he grows up, his love of glamor and rock music only grows, so when he meets a handsome American soldier and falls in love, he gets his opportunity to escape from behind the wall. But in order to leave as his soldier’s bride, he must take his mother’s passport and pass a physical exam. And here Hedwig is born.

The gender-change surgery is botched, leaving him with only “an angry inch,” and eventually losing him the love of his soldier (who is pictured loving big sausages and we’ll leave it at that). Living alone in a trailer park, Hedwig is depressed and lonely. Working as a grocery checkout girl and babysitter, he falls for the young son of an officer, and they write beautiful music together. Until his boyfriend runs off with all the songs and becomes a rock star…

Daayra : In this path breaking film directed by Amol Palekar, Nirmal Pandey plays a transvestite who comes in contact with a rape victim. Helming a sensitive story, he personifies human relationships that go beyond narrow identities. So far, he is the only actor to bag a National Award for Best Actress.

Talk to us, leave a comment or mail to us if you want to have a word on abuse or mental health. Share your stories of being victorious at “The Bachpan Project.” and help people deal with their demons.

The goal is not to change how the person feels about his or her gender. Instead, the goal is to deal with the distress that may come with those feelings being non judgmental.



Heading to fridge when stressed?…… It may be #EatingDisorder

Most of us binge eat or head straight to refrigerator when we are stressed, but do you know this when uncontrolled may turn into a serious psychological disturbance .

According to the National Institute of Mental Health eating disorders primarily affect girls and women.1 But eating disorders aren’t just a problem for the teenage women so often depicted in the media. Men and boys can also be vulnerable. About a quarter of preadolescence cases of anorexia occur in boys, for example. And binge eating disorder strikes males and females about equally.

There are three major types of eating disorders.

People with anorexia nervosa have a distorted body image that causes them to see themselves as overweight even when they’re dangerously thin. Often refusing to eat, exercising compulsively, and developing unusual habits such as refusing to eat in front of others, they lose large amounts of weight and may even starve to death.

Individuals with bulimia nervosa eat excessive quantities, then purge their bodies of the food and calories they fear by using laxatives, enemas, or diuretics; vomiting; or exercising. Often acting in secrecy, they feel disgusted and ashamed as they binge, yet relieved of tension and negative emotions once their stomachs are empty again.

Like people with bulimia, those with binge eating disorder experience frequent episodes of out-of-control eating. The difference is that binge eaters don’t purge their bodies of excess calories.

Treatment plans often are tailored to individual needs and may include one or more of the following:

  • Individual, group, or family psychotherapy
  • Medical care and monitoring
  • Nutritional counseling
  • Medications (for example, antidepressants)

Eating Disorder In Cinema

Sharing the Secret – An amazing movie about the mother-daughter relationship  It is among those movies about eating disorders that focus on bulimia instead of anorexia. The movie is about a child psychologist Nina Moss and her daughter Beth, played by Alison Lohman, who is a slim, upbeat overachiever. However, Nina feels something is just not right with Beth, and she is right because Beth becomes bulimic, purging, and binging, which things start to get out of hand, shows the importance of family and friends in overcoming.

Unrealistic beauty standards leading to anorexia in young girls is beautifully portrayed in Dying to Dance which is  about a talented ballerina Alyssa who is asked to lose weight to stay in the game. But, soon things go out of hand and anorexia takes over her life. Another movie Thin also traces the journey of four anorexic women.

The road to eating disorder recovery starts with admitting you have a problem. This admission can be tough, especially if you’re still clinging to the belief—even in the back of your mind—that weight loss is the key to happiness, confidence, and success. Even when you finally understand this isn’t true, old habits are still hard to break.

The good news is that the eating disorder behaviors you’ve learned can be unlearned if you’re motivated to change and willing to ask for help. However, overcoming an eating disorder is about more than giving up unhealthy eating behaviors. It’s also about rediscovering who you are beyond your eating habits, weight, and body image

Remember- You all are beautiful.

Let there be no D for Depression

PC:Therese Borchard

I had plans to write Depression for the day four of A to Z Challenge and yesterday the news came of a 20 year old boy committing suicide at Mumbai. The way he live streamed his suicide on Facebook was scary. I just felt that i could reverse back the time clock and talk to him, save him and let us be around people who are struggling with depression.

Sadness is something we all experience. It is a normal reaction to difficult times in life and usually passes with a little time. When a person has depression, it interferes with daily life and normal functioning. It can cause pain for both the person with depression and those who care about him or her. Doctors call this condition “depressive disorder,” or “clinical depression.” It is a real illness. It is not a sign of a person’s weakness or a character flaw. You can’t “snap out of” clinical depression. Most people who experience depression

So i decided to give up cinematic portrayal of depression and write a poem on Depression instead, here “He” refers to depression and before you hit back at me, it’s gender neutral.

Through this poem i want just to portray how depression feels like after having talked to many people who are facing it. It’s in a girl’s narrative just because i am a girl ,

“I was lonely, sad and bitterly lost

Even weed wasn’t helping

I stalked my ex on Facebook

Went through all the chats

Something was still sinking

When one day I saw this cutie

staring at me

He waved, I said Hi

He came over and smiled

I ordered a latte and he a black coffee

I thought he seemed genuinely nice

He came over with me to my room

And I said dude that was quick

But who cares when you are

Lonely, sad and bitterly lost

He refused to leave and it felt good

It was a change when leaving was a way

I thought a little fooling around is okay

There is a thing called No strings attached

And we will be on our way

I was happy, light and smiling bright

I needed no one and was giving a tough fight

No one knew he was there

So I locked my room with him in it

And made love with promises to keep

It’s been days, months and more than a year

He is still sitting at the edge of my chair

Sarcastically smiling and whispering in my ears

“Dare you go anywhere, You are mine”

I wish someone could see him and throw him out

I feel a loose a cell every day, is he eating me out

He ties me up and forces himself upon me

I try to scream, he cups my lips

And when bruises come up, he calls it a love bite

I try to run, he pulls me back and slaps me hard

I thought he loved my long tresses

I cut them short to shoo him away

And when I turned, he was right there

Staring it me and I shivered with fear

He thrust me hard that day

As if trying to say “dare you even tried your way”

I request, I plead, I beg him to leave

He just laughs scaring the shit out of me

He keeps me awake all night, every night

Says “I will hug you” and crushes me from inside

If you are reading please help me

Talk to me, hold me, please pull me back

He is taking me to a dark tunnel

Never ever to return back”

Help people around dealing with depression, they may not say it but they need it.

Courtesy- Psych Central


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